How to Deal With Rude and Spoiled Children
Children who are entitled, spoiled and rude are often the product of a society where all the information, products and media children need and want are virtually at their fingertips. Teaching your child about hard work and responsibility helps him learn to appreciate effort and respect others. As a parent, consistent insistence on proper manners and instilling value in respect for others shows your child that rudeness and a spoiled, entitled attitude are simply unacceptable.
Give your child various responsibilities and chores; present them as opportunities to earn the things that he wants. Your child is more likely to appreciate his toys, games and electronics if he works to earn them on his own. A chore chart or using an allowance system helps your child learn that nothing is gained without effort.
Encourage your child to take responsibility for his actions without making excuses to other parents, teachers and authority figures for your child's behavior. By making excuses, you enable your child to continually exhibit the same rude, spoiled behavior. Instead, allow him to reap the natural consequences of his actions to learn that only he is responsible for the reactions to his behavior.
Communicate to your child the importance of defining his self-worth based upon his talents, interests and beliefs, rather than the things that he owns and gains. Set a good example in your home by placing a lower value on things and a higher value on self-esteem. Help your child recognize his self-worth by talking about the things that he's good at and his best qualities.
Present consistent rules for manners and take a zero tolerance attitude toward rude, spoiled behavior. It's vital that your stand be consistent.
Offer positive feedback when your child acts less rude and spoiled. Be specific with praise so your child knows that you recognized a change in his attitude and behavior. Focusing on the negative points of your child's behavior often breeds resentment and an even more sour disposition. Give frequent feedback so your child creates positive associations between appropriate behavior and your reaction.
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Discipline Techniques for a Ten-Year-Old
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Strategies Used to Redirect Child Behavior
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- Raising Respectful Kids in a Rude World: Teaching Your Children the Power of Mutual Respect and Consideration; Gary D. McKay, et al.; 2001
- U.S. Department of Education: Helping Your Child Become a Responsible Citizen